Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
