I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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