Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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