People in love make me want to vomit
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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