getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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