That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize