Sponge bath it is.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
