i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
