We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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