So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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