Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
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