when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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