i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize