Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
