wrigley field is MILF paradise
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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