DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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