sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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