Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Randomize
