Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
50% drunk capacity currently
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
