I can tuck mytits in my pants
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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