so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
We talked him into tasing himself.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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