What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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