and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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