Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
