You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.