summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Randomize
