new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
