I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
