his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Sext me about skeletons
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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