I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
His nipple licking is glorious
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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