I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
