party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
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the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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