I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
