I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
He did a backflip because drugs
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