Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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