I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
