Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
birth control should be required to get into college
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Randomize