Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
