she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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