I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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