Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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