Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
