Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
