Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
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couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
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