so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Everyone says I win the strip club
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
