The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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