If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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