Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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