I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
