Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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