so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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