her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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