im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
